


Hello

by liamthebastard



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, M/M, Oikawa-centric, probably doesn't make much sense, really poorly written I'm sorry, totally inspired by the Adele song tho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-15
Updated: 2015-11-15
Packaged: 2018-05-01 19:49:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5218613
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/liamthebastard/pseuds/liamthebastard
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Oikawa is the type to cut and run with zero warning, but even he has regrets.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hello

“ _Iwaizumi, leave a message_.”

“Hello, it's me. I'll be in town for a few days next month, and I think we should meet. Call me, or message, just… Let me know.”

*

Regret was not something Oikawa Tooru did well. Anger, yes. Passion, absolutely. Even his sadness and joy were great skills. But regret… He'd only felt it once, and it had shaken him so thoroughly, held him so tightly, that it was the only constant in his life for a decade. The other dwellings came and went in their time, but regret set up shop and refused to leave.

It was like an open wound, one Oikawa couldn't stop poking, just to see if it would still hurt. It would, it did, and it never seemed to even try to heal. Wasn't time supposed to help? Why hadn't the time and distance stitched the wound up? Oikawa would rather have a hideous scar and closure than a bleeding heart and questions.

*

“ _Iwaizumi, leave a message_.”

“Hello, can you hear me? These international calls are terrible maybe that's why you haven't replied. It's crazy out here, California is _huge_! It's like junior high all over again, the world's so big and it's mine for the taking. Anyway, I leave for a visit home tomorrow, maybe we can see each other while I'm there?”

*

Twenty-eight missed calls in a span of two weeks. Twenty-eight voicemails Oikawa had left. Maybe it was his timing. After all, they were a million miles apart, time zones were a thing, he must have just been calling when Iwa-chan was out. Because there was no way, no possible way, that Iwazumi was ignoring him.

Of course, none of the voicemails actually said anything important. None of them said the words Oikawa desperately needed to tell Iwa-chan. He was saving that for when he actually got through to him. It was something he wanted to say, not record, so Iwa-chan knew he meant it.

*

_Before_

“You're _where_?” Iwaizumi demanded, his voice too-loud and furious.

Oikawa shrugged, even though Iwa-chan couldn't see him. “I'm in California, I just turned my phone back on, and saw all my missed calls. Did you _miss_ me, Iwa-chan?” he sing-songed as he grabbed his luggage. Despite his cheery tone, he could feel his face and eyes set in stone, daring Iwaizumi to say something, anything, that would let him spark a fight.

“As if,” Iwaizumi scoffed. “But when are you coming back? College starts soon, you've gotta be here or your mom will actually kill me.”

Sometimes, Oikawa genuinely didn't know what he was doing. He knew what he was saying was hurtful, cruel even, but he couldn't seem to stop himself. “I'm not coming back, Iwa-chan. Mom already knows, she's known for months. You didn't really think I'd be content staying in Japan, did you?” The unspoken _you didn't think I'd be content with you_ echoes in the silence between them after Oikawa’s words.

Finally, Iwaizumi speaks. “Goodbye, Oikawa.” 

The loud chirp of a disconnected call managed to crack Oikawa’s mask long enough for a few tears to fall, but by the time he hailed a cab in front of the airport, his eyes were dry. Iwaizumi would see, this was the best choice. He'd see, and he'd forgive him.

*

“ _Iwaizumi, leave a message_.”

“Hello, how are you? I know I haven't asked. Isn't it shocking that I, Oikawa Tooru could only speak about myself? Well sorry for that. Hope you're good. Did you ever make it out of Miyagi? I didn't see you when I visited last year. You deserve bigger and better things, Iwa-chan, I hope you get them.”

*

It'd been years since Oikawa had last seen or spoken to Iwaizumi. He'd tried every mode of communication known to man, excluding dumb ones like carrier pigeons -okay so he'd even tried that but apparently it's a lot harder than it looks-, and still Iwaizumi wouldn't speak to him.

Makki and Mattsun both said he was doing well. But they wouldn't divulge any more information on him. It'd taken them the better part of a year to even talk to Oikawa at all after his disappearing act, and they'd refused to tell him any of how Iwaizumi had handled it. Oikawa knew it couldn't have been good, not when he and Iwa-chan were- whatever they'd been.

High school romances never lasted anyway, that's what Oikawa had told himself as he'd planned his move. He'd gotten a passport, found a roommate, enrolled in school, all the while playing the part of something important to Iwaizumi. When they curled up together in Iwa-chan’s bed and stared at the ceiling as they talked about their future, Oikawa had felt his heart crack a little under the strain of his secret. When Iwaizumi had kissed him in the mornings, sleep-warm and affectionate, Oikawa had been forced to hold back tears at how much it hurt.

But he hadn't been able to stop himself. He was in too deep, it was too late. He'd always dreamed of living in the States and now that he had the chance, he wasn't going to give it up just for some guy.

 _Iwa-chan’s never been ‘some guy’_ a traitorous voice had whispered, but Oikawa brushed it aside and reached for his dreams with both hands, pretending not to care that it meant letting go of the one thing he'd always held close.

*

In almost six years, Oikawa had been back to Miyagi exactly twice. Neither of those times had he seen hide or hair of Iwa-chan. There was no reason for this time to be different. 

But Oikawa felt different as he waited for his flight to board. Perhaps it was knowing that this time he was going home for good, that his wandering soul was finally going to get some rest. Whatever it was, it was time for him to exorcise the ghost in his life. He might not get to apologize in person, or even to Iwaizumi directly, but he could try. He reached for his phone.

*

“ _Iwaizumi, leave a message_.”

“Hello, Iwa-ch - Iwaizumi. I don't know how many times I've called you, but there's something I've been trying to say. I'm sorry. I know I broke your heart, and I know that it probably doesn't matter, because obviously you're not torn up about it, but I'm still sorry. So sorry. There's nothing I can say to fix this, but I'm coming home, for good, and I wanted to know if we can maybe be friends again? I know it's selfish, but I- I still love you, and I want to learn how to love you right, in whatever way you need, if you'll-”

The call beeped, indicating that Oikawa had taken too long in his message. He hung up and turned his phone to airplane mode. 

*

Flights go a lot faster when you sleep through them, Oikawa had learned. It seemed like no time at all passed from when he departed to when the jolt of descent woke him. He stumbled off the plane, bleary eyed and tired, and almost immediately fell into a group hug from his older sister and nephew. Takeru, who had grown so much in the years since he'd last seen him. He was nearly a man now, strong and excited for life to begin. Oikawa couldn't help feeling a little washed up next to him. 

They drove home in near silence, Oikawa napping most of the way. When they arrived at his sister's house, she sent him upstairs to the guest room to get unpacked. He plugged his phone in to charge while he unpacked his suitcases. He'd sold almost everything to pay for the move back, so it didn't take long. When everything was done, Oikawa glanced at his phone. Still on airplane mode. 

He flipped it back into regular mode, just to see if he'd missed anything from Makki or Mattsun, both of whom knew of his return. Instead, his phone immediately started ringing, abs the contact photo that popped up almost stopped Oikawa’s heart. 

It had been taken at graduation by an enterprising Makki, snapped at the exact moment Iwaizumi had grumpily accepted Oikawa’s second button. His mouth was pursed like he was angry, but Iwa-chan’s eyes were soft and adoring.

With shaking hands and tears already pricking at his eyes, Oikawa accepted the call.

“Hajime,” he signed, the name coming out like razor blades. 

But the voice that answered was just as rough. “Tooru. Hello.”


End file.
